Tips for a Productive Family Meeting
The purpose of a family meeting is to foster open communication among family members. It is a safe place where everyone is free to say what they think and feel as they cooperate to make decisions and solve problems. A structured meeting helps this to happen when a family is ready for it.
- Setting aside one-on-one time to talk to the person, before the meeting starts.
- Create an atmosphere of openness to discuss the full range of topics.
- Create an agenda, and give it out a couple of days before the meeting.
- Research different options before attending the meeting.
- Use respectful listening.
- Keep an open mind.
- Going over the list of caregiving needs you previously drew up.
- Pointing out areas in which someone might be able to help.
- Asking if they would like to help, and if so, in what way do they feel comfortable.
- Making sure the person understands what would be most helpful for both you and the caregiving recipient.
- Build consensus.
- Designate a note-taker to record.
- Recognize the emotional factors that can surface during a family meeting.
- Consider enlisting the help of an outside facilitator.
- Give people time to digest what is happening.
- Once the meeting has ended use technology to stay connected.
- Be flexible, be willing to give different ideas a trial run.
- Give everyone the agenda a couple of days before the meeting.
- Choose a location where most people will feel comfortable.
- Meetings can occur regularly, a narrow focus for each meeting can help.
- Encourage all family members to participate, long-distance caregivers can call in.
- Speaking in a respectful way helps the group stay calm and keep the discussion productive.
- Use "I" messages, instead of "you" messages. Watch for hidden "you" messages.
- Anyone can call a break.
- Remind everyone that the goal is to talk about care for your older adult, not to fix family issues.
- Distributing a calendar with different days marked with responsibilities and commitments can also help each person honor the agreements made.
- Consider having a mediator at the family meeting.
- End the meeting with something fun that affirms family members.